The Big Question

February 17, 2008
Genesis 12:1-4a, John 3:1-17
Sermon by Carrie Eikler
Lent 2

Are you born again? If so, can you remember the time that you became “born again?”

During one of our Roots and Shoots classes this fall we talked specifically about baptism. At the end of the class Terry Green wanted to bring up an experience that he had many years ago. When Terry was living in Ft. Wayne, Indiana, he was doing some work in the home of an associate pastor of his church. They needed some painting done and some floor work. Terry stepped up to help out with the painting (I believe). Terry recalled that on the first day of work, the doorbell rang and on the stoop was the young man who had come to work on the flooring. Terry recalled that it wasn’t more than ten minutes into their time together, the young man “popped the question.” The question was not, “are you married?” or “what neighborhood do you live in?” or “are you a Bears fan, a Colts fan, or a Browns fan?”(the essential question for anyone living in northerneastern Indiana). None of these were the question. The question was…“Are you saved?” Are you born again?

Have you ever been asked that question? Have you ever asked the question? It is my sense that most Christians feel strongly about this topic. They either feel strong in embracing this concept, or they feel strongly in their resistance to it. To me, it seems like you can’t be ambivalent about “being born again.” Some of you may have a clear moment where you can look and say that in that moment, you were born again. You would have your own words to describe it. Maybe it was like Paul who scripture says had the scales fall from his eyes. Maybe it was an emotional whirlwind where the Spirit of God left you breathless, full of tears—full of joy. Maybe it was in the desperate moments of your life where you gave over all your fears and anxieties and invited the love of God to fill the empty places of your life. Or maybe like Abram, you were invited by God into the unknown territories of this world—it was in your “born again moment” that you closed your eyes, fell into faith all the while hoping that God’s promises were enough to keep you afloat…and that first step made all the difference.

I remember my experience with the big question. When I was a junior or senior in high school the importance of being born again and the power of salvation was very much a part of my vocabulary. During this time, a new girl, Melissa had moved into town and we struck a friendship. Now there aren’t many people who moved into my little town. There weren’t many people who moved out, for that matter. I believe that 85% of my graduating class were the same kids I started kindergarten with.

So when someone moves into town, it is something worth noticing. Especially with Melissa. Melissa moved to Illinois from Alabama. So to begin with, her thick southern accent was enough to get us wondering about her. She became even more mysterious when we found out that she didn’t move here with her family, but had moved up here to live with her boyfriend’s family. Apparently they met that summer while he was visiting family down south. We all wondered what was the story behind this girl? Was she pregnant? Did she run away from home? Did her parent’s kick her out? Of course no one actually asked her, they just had fun speculating, assigning her with a history that was of our own making.

Nevertheless, we did become friends, and I’m sure that she told me the story, but I forgot what it was. After we graduated, I never saw her again. I’m sure she that she told me her plans for the future, but I forgot what they were. What I do remember, however, was one day Melissa and I snuck out of study hall and sat talking on the floor in the large handicap stall in the girls bathroom (the rebel that I was). I listened to her pour out the struggles she had with her family, her boyfriend, life “up here in the North.” She laid her heart bare to me, the only friend she had made since moving to our town. And I remember as clearly as I’m talking to you my first response. I asked her the Big Question. After all of that, I took a breath, and asked her, “Are you born again?”

I’m sure she told me an answer but I can’t remember what it was. But that day, that encounter, has bubbled up in me frequently over the years. I’ve always wondered, “why did I ask that?” Why didn’t I just let her say what she needed to say, without the qualification of if she was born again? Did I think that if she said no, I could convince her that being born again would solve all her problems? Or maybe I thought if she said yes, I could tell her that her problems could be given to Jesus (since she had a personal relationship with him, after all), and he would take care of them? But on the other hand, maybe my asking had nothing to do with her, but everything to do with me.

I probably wonder about my response because over time, I became one who felt strongly about the question “are you born again”… but more on the skeptical side. Jesus scholar, and born again Christian, Marcus Borg gives words to my own hesitancy. He says that the “being born again” status often assumes a narrow defintion and that “In some Christian circles, to be born again can mean accepting a certain set of beliefs, a particular conservative theology, often express in a question using a salvation formula such as ‘Do you believe in Jesus Christ as your personal lord and savior?’ In charismatic churches, it means receiving the gifts of the Spirit, especially speaking in tongues….” He continues “[M]ost of us have known at least one person who was born again in a remarkably unattractive way. When being born again leads to a rigid kind of righteousness, judgmentalism, and sharp boundaries between an in-group and an out-group…” (The Heart of Christianity, San Francisco: Harper Collins, 2003).And yet for others, their sense of being born again is a personal issue, something that happened to them that they don’t necessarily want to force upon others, but a state that they wish to invite others into. So no wonder there are some among who hesitate when we are asked the Big Question, because it can mean very different things to different people. After all, if you understand yourself to be a Christian, it is difficult to answer “no” to the big question, just because you don’t like what it has come to imply.

Our New Testament scripture today is the classic text in which the born again language is introduced into the Christian vocabulary. The gospel of John is a rich collection of stories that highlight what was at the essence of Jesus’ teachings and ministry to the early Christian community, and John skillfully uses symbolism and metaphor to gaze into the heart of Christ’s teachings. It is obvious that to Jesus and to the New Testament at as whole the concept of being born again is important. But like us, it seems Nicodemus wasn’t too clear on the concept either.

Nicodemus is a Pharisee, the people in the Jesus stories we are suppose to “not like,” but generally end up sounding a lot more like ourselves that we might expect. Nicodemus says to Jesus, “Rabbi, we know that you are a teacher who has come from God, for no one can do these signs that you do apart from the presence of God.” And Jesus seems to change the subject, or perhaps, he answers the question that is beneath question. He says, “Very truly, I tell you, no one can see the kingdom of God without being born from above.”

Here it where it seems to get tricky for old Nicodemus. John loves to use double meanings, and here is an example: the Greek for “born from above” can also be translated “born again.” For the first Christian communities reading John’s gospel, they would know this double meaning and see what John is doing. Like when I spoke with the young people about “change for the world,” we know our language enough to hold both meanings at once. But Nicodemus is set up to question the literal meaning of “born again” – he says “How can anyone be born after growing old? Can one enter a second time into the mother’s womb and be born?” Now after giggling a bit at the outrageous image of this, I can just hear the mothers in the room bellowing, “Oh no you don’t, you being born once was just enough.” Jesus then goes on to say that this new birth is a birth from above, a birth of the Spirit. To be born again is to enter new life, a life centered in the Spirit of God.

What Nicodemus needs, what Jesus says we all need, is a spiritual rebirth, an internal rebirth, a personal transformation.

But how do we know if we are born again? Is it if we had an emotional experience, if we spoke in tongues, if we felt on fire for the Lord, if we felt at deep peace? I see Jesus saying, you can’t be absolutely certain about a specific time and place: Jesus tells Nicodemus “The wind blows where it chooses” The Spirit is often referred to as “wind” so here it says “The ‘spirit’ blows where it chooses, and you hear the sound of it, but you do not know where it comes from or where it goes. So it is with everyone who is born of the Spirit.” The spirit is like a dancing wind, whose movements can’t be predicted, or characteristics prescribed, or presence qualified. To be born of this spirit is not about believing specific doctrines or reciting right beliefs. It’s something different…something more.

No matter how much we would like to think we have control over it, being born again is the work of the Spirit. Again, the words of Marcus Borg, “Whether it happens suddenly or gradually, we can’t make it happen, either by strong desire and determination or by learning and believing the right beliefs. But we can be intentional about being born again.”

It is with such intentionality that we see born-again experiences happening in the most unexpected places. Such as…a cabbage patch in Japan. I read an article this week about a group of men in Japan, in a town outside of Tokyo who were commemorating “Shout Your Love From the Middle of a Cabbage Patch" Day. This group of men positioned themselves in the middle of a cabbage patch and walking up and down the rows shouted “I love you!” and “Thank you!” to their wives. For some this was the first time they have ever said these words to their partners. Most of their spouses stood in the field, watching. Some were in tears. The event was held by an organization called “Devoted Husbands.” The goal of this group is to help improve Japan's troubled approach to marriage. In Japan, marriage is often regarded more as a status than as a relationship, but this group hopes that by teaching men to appreciate their wives and express their feelings, they can stop the skyrocketing divorce rate. “Devoted Husbands” hope they can help change attitudes like one man who said "If I said to my wife, 'I love you,' she would think I'm crazy." And he had been married 20 years. The article stated that “for many participants, shouting "I love you" in a cabbage patch was an important first step.” (Christian Science Monitor, February 13, 2008).

In a way, that might be an important first step for us. Just expressing our love. Sure, with your wives and husbands, and children, and friends, but maybe also, with God. Maybe with yourself. Maybe with those enemies you have. Maybe with those who you think don’t deserve your love. Jesus stresses that being born again is essential to the way of Christ because it is the entry into a different kind of life, a life that is lived for what Jesus identified as the Great Commandment: to love God with all your being and your neighbor as yourself. “Growth in love, growth in compassion, is the primary quality of life in the Spirit,” says Borg. “It is also the primary criterion for distinguishing a genuine born-again experience from one that only appears to be one.” When we are born again, we are born into deeper love and compassion. When we prayerfully invite Christ-like love and compassion in our lives, we are in the process of being born again, and again. It’s a journey. Like Abram, it requires answering a call that tells us to pack up our lives, and hit the road in the unknown territories of God’s mysterious terrain. But it doesn’t just stop with answering Yes. It is saying yes over and over again. It’s saying “God help me!” over and over again. It’s about saying “Help me love” over and over throughout our lives.

So when our brother Terry was asked the Big Question that day in Ft. Wayne, he was honest in his response. Are you saved? Are you born again? Terry replied, “I don’t know…I can’t put a certain date to it or a specific time. I guess I can say that I am continually in the process of Christian renewal. I don’t think it’s about specific date and time, but rather a question we struggle with until we die.” This young man seemed to know all about the right answer to that question, seemed to be confident in his faith and his born again status. But as Terry and he began to form a relationship, the young man began to confide in him with his problems, about money and his marriage, and it was clear that he didn’t have all the answers he needed to make his life perfect.

And isn’t that how it often goes? When we put aside all the right and wrong answers, the questions that ultimately serve to qualify who is in and who is out, in favor of forming a genuine and caring relationship with someone…then, it seems like we always get to the heart of each others pain, and joy. We get to know who people really are, rather than what we might assume about them. We uncover how God works in their lives, rather than what God did in one solitary moment. We might learn to sit on the floor with someone in a bathroom stall, or in each others homes, or even in a cabbage patch and tell them we love them, rather than telling them where they ought to be.

When we realize that being born again is a constant journey, rather than a single moment we recognize the tending, and nurturing, and constant need for faith it requires. Maybe if we try to live by a law of grace, rather than by some litmus test, we ourselves might learn to grow in love, compassion, and mercy. And each time we open ourselves to these gifts, we are born again…and again…and again.