Look Me in the Eyes

sermon by Carrie Eikler
Luke 24:13-35
Easter 3

Who here hasn’t ever wondered about the secret to happiness?
Is it income? Education? Upbringing?
A team of National Geographic researchers recently took on this question.
Where are the happiest people in the world, and how can we be like them?

Basing their research on the three most well respected studies of overall well-being, a group led by Dan Buettner set off to explore what he has called The Blue
Zones,
the places in the world where people live the longest—
and in a follow up study, he went to learn from the people who are considered the happiest.
In his book Thrive: Finding Happiness the Blue Zones Way he highlights four of the world’s happiest areas, Denmark, Singapore, Mexico, and…San Luis Obispo, California.

Now, I have to say…when I hear these four places, it is somewhat shocking to think about them as being overly happy (aside from California, which I guess I would assume is pretty happy).

When I think of Denmark, Singapore, and Mexico I think of, respectively, cold long dark nights, the caning of Michael Fay for vandalism in 1994, and drug cartels and political corruption.

But apparently regardless of weather, corporal punishment, rampant violence and poverty…people still have the ability to be pretty happy. Even be the happiest people on the planet.

The National Geographic team revealed their hypothesis that if we can make permanent changes in six areas of life, we are well on our way to being happier people. Here is a recap of these six areas, taken from a brief report on their findings.

1.Community: Surveys from 146 countries, representing most of the world’s population, show that the top factors promoting happiness are: economic freedom, low unemployment rate, tolerance, and quality of government. That is, the biggest determinant of our personal happiness is where we live.

2. Workplace: Most of us spend more than half our waking hours at work. Having a short commute, a job that engages our talents and a best friend at work are three of the biggest determinants of a happy work-life.

3. Social Life: The happiest Americans report 7-8 hours of social interaction a day–real-face time, not Facebook time. Joining a club that meets just once per month can have an effect on your happiness equivalent to doubling your salary.

4. Financial Life: You don’t have to keep telling people in Brethren and Mennonite congregations that money can’t buy happiness. We know it. Now whether or not we really believe it that’s another story. We need food, shelter, education, mobility and healthcare. But the happiest people, after they attain those things, spend their money on experiences, not material things, and on financial security.

5. Home: Setting up science-backed nudges can subtly lead us to behaviors that favor happiness. Adopting a dog, for example, will dependably lower stress hormones daily. The happiest people only watch a half hour of TV a day, and reducing the number of screens in your home will help you to watch less TV.
And finally

6. [The area of the] Self: People who can articulate their life purpose in one sentence are 20% happier than those who can’t. Taking time to know your values, strengths, talents, passions –and how to share those gifts – can raise your well-being.

These broad categories probably don’t surprise you. We certainly know that if we don’t like our job, if we don’t have a job, if our family relationships are stressed we will be unhappy. But isn’t it interesting how small some of the factors can be. Reduce the number of electronic screens in your house. Adopt a dog. Take time to put your life purpose in one sentence. Join a club.

And in the midst of all of this, as you probably can expect—though it doesn’t have its own category—happiness is part of the food we eat.

So sure, he had suggestions like, you’ll be happier if you eat oatmeal and walnuts for breakfast rather than greasy eggs and bacon. You’ll be happier if incorporate more beans in your diet. A glass of wine--and yes, in moderation-- has heart healthy effects.

But he said something about food that I think is not so familiar to most Americans. It’s not all about what you eat. But it’s about who you eat with. And to take that a bit further, it is also about how you eat when you’re with those people.

Denmark-- that very cold, very dark place-- is considered the happiest country on earth. People interact about seven hours a day. But they don’t get up to schedule seven hours of interaction, this connection is not primarily in meetings, or on Facebook or in Tweets. Rather, it happens around food and the rituals around eating.

Because of the long dark days, many people in Denmark intentionally gather with others, and not just their nuclear family.
A couple times a week—not just Sunday dinner, but two or three times a week—they meet with extended family…neighbors… friends, for a gathering called hougie.

At hougie, they gather around a small table with candlelight, have open-faced sandwiches called smorbrood, a plate of herring, pate, and cheese. There is an interactive nature to this meal as people are gathering, reaching, passing, filling their plates with a little of this and a little of that…

They also have a glass of wine, as you might expect. But the thing about wine at hougie, is that it’s not just a drink. Before they drink they don’t just clink their wine glasses, reflects National Geographic researcher Dan Buettner.

Before they drink, they look each other in the eye through and around the candlelight.
They connect with one another.
They make sure to see one another.
In the long, dark cold days of winter, people have discovered what is necessary to keep them from the abyss of spiritual darkness and coldness.
They look each other in the eye.

Can you look someone in the eye? How about looking someone in the eye in the darkest, coldest times in your life?

I doubt that road leading to and from Emmaus was a highway in the midst of a Blue Zone, even as close as it was to Jerusalem, that spiritually holy city. Happiness would not be the word of the day, and American’s obsession with the “pursuit of it” would certainly be a cultural oddity.

Three days after the crucifixion of Jesus had some people hiding, some people weeping, some people cheering, some people walking…just walking.
It was an especially electric time, you can imagine, with the news that his body had gone missing…some say resurrected.
Probably many, like we heard about Thomas last week, probably many weren’t sure if they could believe the talk, the stories.

But these two, on the road to Emmaus, were telling their own stories.
About the things that happened. About Jesus. And then Jesus sidles up to them, just another traveler on the road--being a bit nosy, really-- asking what they’re talking about.
And they give him the recap—who Jesus was, how he was convicted, how he died, and now,
“moreover” they say, as if it is the icing on the cake,
Moreover, as if all that other stuff wasn’t enough… some women of the group astounded them. Saying they saw angels who said Jesus was alive.
Some from the group went back to see if it was true—if Jesus was dead or alive—but they saw nothing.

Eventually… these two travelers did see him. Recognition. Eyes opened. They were now on the inside of the story. You can imagine the jealously of the others who weren’t so lucky…How did they see him?
Was it that he seemed so interested in their experience?
Was it in the familiar way he told the stories about the prophets and about Moses? Was it the way he lovingly chastised them for being a bit slow on the uptake to believe in what their own texts and stories have told them.
Are these the things that helped them recognize Jesus?
Maybe. Probably.

But apparently, no amount of reminding, or correction, or teaching were enough in and of themselves for recognition
It got their hearts burning, as they said.
But it didn’t get their eyes, or their hearts, seeing.
It was all just an experience that could have been left on the road…

Until they invited him in. Until…they stopped him from passing by.
Until they lit the candles, sat around a small table, broke bread, took wine, looked at each other in the eye and then...they recognize him.
And then…[poof]…he’s gone.

Mennonite pastor Ron Adams speaks to the simplicity of this moment, “A spoken word. A bit of bread. A sip of wine. Our texts insist there is a power here [in these simple things] that draws people to God and reveals the presence of Christ”.
[pause]
A spoken word. A bit of bread. A sip of wine. Looking in the eyes of another.
[pause]

In days like these when we’re lured into false confidence that we are safe because the death of one man—when there are celebrations, parties, couches burning in the streets—we know that we still need more light, more clarity, more of God’s word burning in our hearts.

And maybe we need more breaking of bread together and blessing of wine together. Looking one another in the eye.
And I think we know, deep down, that it’s not just symbolic.
Not just in the taking of communion on Sunday morning or even at Love Feast. Not even with those we see everyday when we wake up, who know us so well.

But with those who are vaguely familiar, but really strangers.
With neighbors who care about our community.
With church family who care about a spiritual journey.

Moreover…it is with the Christ that is hidden in each one of us, ready to be revealed those desperately seeking, but not seeing…as Gunilla Norris implies in her poem called Plenty…

Having shared our bread
We know that we are
No longer hungry. It is enough

That you see me for myself
That I see you for yourself
That we bless what we see

And do not borrow, do not use
One another. This is how we know
We are no longer hungry…

That the world is full of terror, full of beauty
And yet we are not afraid to find solace here.
To be bread for each other. To live.

Open your home, open your heart, sit down, eat together, look one another in the eye.

Granted, we won’t know if we will be any happier or not. I don’t even know how we can quantify that.
But if we try, I bet we will feel a bit more human.
More connected.
More burning knowledge with us and more
...simply more recognition of Christ in the world.

And we will be seen…
And we will see Christ.


Amen.